Member-only story
It’s impossible to “hold” anyone else “accountable”
This powerful language frames arrogant orientations, creating failure—what to do instead
I’m not going to address whether we should “hold others accountable.” It’s a long and deep philosophical discussion where excellent arguments can be made for both perspectives. There are valid points to be made all around this question. But I will start by sharing this quick story to get you thinking about what is even required for an accountability system to exist between people.
Late into 2020, when my partner and I were first getting to know each other, I was recovering from abdominal surgery. It was a much slower than average recovery and my fitness suffered hard. I wanted to get back into running and it wasn’t happening. She suggested I make commitments to her that I would go running, because that would help hold me accountable. I said that wouldn’t work. She didn’t understand because it was something that works for her. I had to think about it for a while to explain.
Accountability is responsibility. It’s an owing of something. To be accountable requires that you’ve made some agreements, implicit or explicit.
Me telling Erica I would go running on Wednesday wouldn’t just immediately manufacture an accountability system. I would…
